Endings and Beginnings

Every day offers new possibilities. For my honey and I 2010 begins where 2009 leaves off. Does this justify a celebration? Of course, especially for romantic reasons.

Who we’ve met – humans as social beings enjoy connections with others to share ideas and enjoy camaraderie. Our acquaintances expanded from attending a wedding, reaching out to new neighbors and regular visits to the public library.

What we’ve done – we share our accomplishments. We’re both looking to the future and everything we’ve done individually or as a couple is a joint effort. This year publications increased and I’m especially proud of inclusion in Cern Zoo (and it's top secret which story is mine until next year - perhaps you can guess).

Where we want to go – we prefer to not make resolutions though we do set goals. Our romantic destinations for the coming year include a moonlight picnic by the lake, toad hollow to learn more about ecosystems and human effect on them, to the top of a mountain (any mountain) and at least one public lecture.

How we plan to get there – laugh a lot. Rocky patches become less tragic when we take them less seriously. We enjoy collecting humorous anecdotes and share our memories. This year we’ve added to our “inside jokes” with a heart to heart with a monkey, the draw of our magnetic personalities to draw others to us at concerts and going up a tree and out on the limb

Why we choose to go forward together – Our commitment to each other is our absolute and to that end we make time together a priority. As situations arise we adapt physically and philosophically. May you take advantage of many opportunities in the coming year and joy in the ability to share them with someone you love. Join us as we find new dating possibilities that are environmentally friendly. Thank you for spending this past year with us.

THE END

Season of Gifts – Family and Friends

A commitment to sustainable lifestyle doesn’t mean eschewing all things commercial during the holiday season. My honey and I aren’t lavish givers, though we do enjoy a little shopping as eco-elves. Shopping during the holidays makes a beautiful date especially if you love being around other people like I do. Choosing gifts is harder and we’ve come up with a few guidelines we use.

Know the recipient – make gifts personal and don’t bother giving something that will be returned for a refund. If the recipient loves hot chocolate how about two mugs, a jar of organic, rainforest friendly or fair trade chocolate mix and maybe a comfy blanket or quilt. We also love to give trees for planting and books.

Hand-knit socks – so, knowing how to knit is a must, but choosing the wool yarn from small, local producers and spending time making the socks adds something special to the gift. And the socks seem extra warm and cozy

A craft – artists and crafters can create one-of-a-kind gifts for family and friends. Some artists hesitate to give this type of gift afraid it makes them look cheap. Have no fear, this gift becomes ever more precious throughout the years. I painted a picture for my wall of a waterfall; my grandmother loved it so I gave it to her. She kept it through two moves one to assisted living and then to the nursing home. The painting is now back on my wall and is more precious because my grandmother loved it so much.

Tickets – entertainment is expensive and providing tickets for two and offering to baby sit if the couple has children allows for a needed evening out for them and an evening of fun with borrowed children for you.

Fill a need – if someone you know really needs a set of dishes, a kitchen table or to have windows washed, go ahead and grant the wish. For bigger items check out thrift stores and second hand to find one that can be refurbished. For recipients of fixed incomes consider, slippers, warm sweaters and sweatshirts, lap blankets or a few good books on tape (if they have something to play them on). Don’t be afraid to re-gift or buy used and let the recipient know of was to pass them on if they are interested.

Gift Bags – Fill a reusable canvas shopping bag with non-perishable food, favorite snacks, a bottle of wine or sparkling cider or perhaps eco-friendly soap, lotion and massage oil as well as spa tools. Be creative as you show that living environmentally friendly can be a pleasure

THE END

A Season of Gifts – Couples

Preparing for the winter holidays means thinking about gifts, whether to give or not and what to give. My honey and I have an agreement; no stocking stuffers or impersonal gifts for each other. This means less stress on the budget and no gift returns. (SIGH! – that’s relief) we don’t have to move mountains of wrapping paper, figure out what to do with non-recyclable packaging, hunt up packages of batteries or head to the store for additional rechargeables. Any gifts given are truly wanted though usually not a surprise.

We found a way to kept the holiday excitement and spirit while banishing stress with Sweetie Days. We wrote 30 personal requests on the back of repurposed paper and placed them in two bowls. Each evening (choose your own interval two/per weekend ‘til New Years, or one every night for eight or twelve days) we draw a slip of paper and fulfill the request. Below are some of our favorite suggestions to inspire your holiday fun.

Pose for a couple’s portrait with me.
Snowball Fight (we didn’t have snow when we drew this request and used rolled up socks instead)
Neck massage
Light Candles and Share your favorite memory
Write me a poem
Dance with me to ‘our’ song
Bake cookies
Give me Seven Minutes in Heaven
Take a walk with me
Lap dance for me (PS – a great resource is The Complete Idiot's Guide to Exotic and Pole Dancing by Wendy Reardon)
Tickle me and make me laugh

Talk about giving – fulfilling a wish for the one you love and having a wish granted in return is a romantic way to spend the season. And it’s a great idea for sparking relationships any time of the year.

THE END

To Woo or Not to Woo

"I need to be wooed."

My honey is a stickler for details. "But you're already caught."

Not the average evening starts with the dictionary and discussion of wooing. The traditional meaning as my honey pointed out is to seek someone's affection with a goal toward marriage.

"Hmm I see the point, but I'll make a second. Relationships need to be nurtured and wooing is one means."

Can I give tried and true a twist?

Every good tradition can benefit from new experiences and knowledge. We've made some environmentally-friendly suggestions, however you know your sweetie better than anyone so go ahead and personalize.

Flowers - how about an organic bouquet, picking a posy in the garden, edible bouquets made with fruit, plant a tree together

Chocolates or candy - consider fair trade, organic and minimally processed chocolate, regional favorites (whoopie pies, moon pies, fried dough, funnel cakes etc.), kettle corn is a tasty sweet too (to make your own add a little sugar to buttered popcorn and maybe a sprinkle of cinnamon or another favorite flavoring. I add vanilla to melted butter)

Love notes - written on garden path stones, printed in chalk-substitute on the sidewalk, set to music and sung to your sweetie

Steal a kiss - sneak up behind your sweetie during chores, in a private arbor or after climbing to the top of a mountain.

Dinner - skip the restaurant and go on a picnic or if you aren't normally the one who cooks and cleans surprise your sweetie with a meal on the table even if it's takeout.

Laughter - my honey used the word 'woo' as the basis for the sound a train makes, the sound a rider on a bucking horse makes, as a howl at the moon and finally as in 'woo baby, I'm exhausted'.

THE END

Bedtime Story for Two

We’re caught in the in-between season, a tease of warmth during the day, temperatures sliding below freezing at night and the occasional unexpected but not unusual snowstorm. My honey and I have become a touch more judicious about our dating activities. Ok, so it’s me; I want to stay warm and nothing feels quite as cozy as smooth sheets, soft pillow and handmade quilts.

Add an energy conserving bedside lamp and a good thriller and we’re good for over an hour. Reading is yet another reason we are compatible, I love to read aloud and my honey loves to listen to my voice. I get practice modulating for public speaking and my honey loves the variations.

“When there’s dialogue and your accent changes from Irish to French to Russian I feel like I’m right there.”

Here I give kudos to the writer we both agree writes a great novel. My honey said, “I wonder if Jack Higgins writes in accent.”

I have to say with respect of a fellow writer, “I’m awed by how real the dialogue is written; it just begs to be read correctly.”

My honey and I are also in the habit of reading snippets to each other when we each are reading to ourselves. Try sharing a good book, a magazine or even the news.

THE END

Wriggler Wranglers

Our outdoor vermicomposting system utilizes worms to break down our vegetarian scraps. Over the summer they doubled in population with extra food from family and neighbors. With winter approaching we made a date to build an indoor worm farm. We had two large Styrofoam shipping coolers someone discarded in our yard and we kept because we figured we could use them for something.

My honey drilled holes in the bottom and sides, cut leftover screening and prepped the boxes with wood shavings, newspaper and sandy soil (we’ve heard crushed eggshells work too for helping the worms’ digestion). I went to the backyard composter to round up worms. Seriously it takes about one pound of worms to process two pounds of table scraps in a week and one pound of worms is about 1000 of the little red wrigglers. We measured our weekly waste and planned accordingly.

One evening after we had the worms settled my honey actually said, “I’m saving these pieces of pizza crust for the worms.”

Neither one of us can tell of Fred/Frieda (worms are hermaphrodites) or Keshia/Ken is the one who is on top waiting for the freshest serving, but the soil for our gardening is beautifully aerated, moist and loaded with nutrients. Doesn’t organic soil sound almost mouthwatering? Weird.

THE END

Four Wheeling the Logging Roads

As a sport perhaps Four Wheeling (also called off-roading) is less likely to be rated an eco-friendly activity. Depends on perspective and those participants attempting to improve the sport. My honey and I chose an eight-mile jaunt on logging roads to look at the forestry and check out the flora and fauna.

The area was clear-cut and then reforested. Clear cutting doesn’t have to be viewed as a bad activity. Especially when the goal is sustainability. All the usable lumber can be used and the slash allowed to decompose for soil enrichment. The diseased trees and dense undergrowth with broken branches and litter was taken care of.

The area was then reforested, the trees are fast growing, placed in neat rows and kept thinned to make forest management easier. Nature’s chance to begin anew and it didn’t take long for the native grasses and shrubs to reseed and take advantage of the rejuvenated soil and extra sunlight.

Preservation is fine to a point. Technology is fine to a point. Instead of seeking to win an argument or compromise, we as humans need to think about our impact on the environment and those around us and then be free to make the most workable decisions instead of relying on emotions.

To get you own information in your area:
1. go to the source instead of accepting regurgitated information
2. consider short-tem and long-term goals
3. forgo philosophical trends in favor of strategic action

For additional resources and information check out the Forest Stewardship Council.
THE END

Need Warmth, Make Soup

Everyone has a go-to food or food pairing for comfort during tough moments. My food is the sandwich, hot or cold, sweet or savory, delicate for tea or hearty for tailgating. And sandwiches are wonderful during a storm, just in case we loose all means of cooking. The great things about the sandwich are versatility and portability. I can take it anywhere, use it for sustenance for any activity and leftovers make tasty filling. Mmm Hmm, mashed potatoes and sweet potato slices are good on pumpernickel bread with a touch of brown mustard.

I use sandwiches for dates too, on our last Friday evening stay-in date though when the temperature were expected to drop below freezing and the weather forecaster threatened snow for that evening all week, I made a slow-cooker stew. I started with 1 stalk celery, two carrots, 1 potato, ½ cup turnip, 1 cup cabbage, ½ cup cracked or bulgur wheat and enough water to make my 2.5-quart Crock Pot two-thirds full. I let the soup cook on high for four hours and added all the leftovers from the fridge (ok, so I need to be judicious not to let the slow-cooker overflow). I let the soup cook on high for another hour or two and then served it up with crusty bread.

The soup gave us a pre-romance glow. I’m experimenting on truing some leftovers into a sandwich filling. If that doesn’t work out, what better accompaniment for soup than sandwiches? May you always have warm toes, full bellies and wonderful evenings of romance.

THE END

Shuffle, Forfeit and Dare

Popularity of televised high stakes card games allows for vicarious enjoyment of betting and winning. Perhaps not the greenest activity with a new deck used for each hand, but some casinos donate used decks to nursing home and there is recycling.

On a more personal level, my honey and I are using a 20-year-old deck of cards to enjoy card games combining skill, competition and winning. Numerous books written on the subject of card games provide standard rules of play. When playing as a couple, we negotiate and agree on rules before a game.

This last time we chose draw poker with the wild card determined by the non-dealer cutting the deck. Winner of each hand could claim a forfeit (truth answer, a kiss or touch and articles of clothing were fair game). Winner’s choice of pleasures or titillations. My honey insisted on a handicap to keep eyeglasses; seeing seems so important to a visual game.

If you are like us, winning is about more than who gets there first. Grab a deck of cards, (an old kid’s game works), a book of rules and imagination. Staying in for a chilly evening could be the most environmentally and romantically friendly activity of all.

The END

Small Town Rainy Night

A warm rain pelted shimmering silver drops visible under the streetlights. The grass on the back down to the brook turned into one big speed slide. We weren’t the first or the only ones whoopin’ and hollerin’ as we ran barefoot on the grass, flopped down and slid into the creek.

Being up to mischief is more fun in a group. Nobody had time for the musty stuff. Adrenalin brought out the rush of exhilaration; we were having too much fun for either fight or flight.

When the rain stopped, we headed home. Hair plastered to our heads, shirts and extra skin layer, arms wrapped around each other. Spontaneity just felt good. Next time you have an opportunity, act on a whim. Nothing is more important that living and loving.

THE END

Starry Night. Does it matter If we get the constellations right?

A cool night, a sleeping bag spread on the grass and the two of us cuddled together looking at the stars. We’ve always heard the maxim once you know the rules you may break them. A pure scientist would strongly suggest using a map of the constellations.

“There’s the north star. I’d always use it to guide me to you.” Aww, I’m a sucker for my honey’s mushiness.

A romantic knows to take advantage of the aphrodisiac power of being able to reshape the symbols and make up a constellation for her lover. I managed to connect enough bright starts to create a heart, borrowed from Cassiopeia, Ursa Major and Orion.

“There is mine for you, enamorat.” From that moment on we will search the sky for our constellation. “You’ll always know I love you and it’s written in the stars. Along with the memory of one cool night, a sleeping bag and the two of us.”


THE END

Work, Talk and Share

My honey and I had a discussion about 'values'. We share a commitment to making choices with positive impact on the environment and came to a few conclusions.

We will make plans in advance - nothing like a degree of preparedness

We are willing to be inconvenienced for our values - we are willing to pay more up-front money and wait a few days if our Energy Star refrigerator fails for our new refrigerator choice.

We will continue our daily reading instead of mindlessly watching television - confession we haven't replaced our last one yet, but it's only been three months and we are enjoying the quiet.

We will make a priority of spending time together when we aren't working - at least one hour of quality time every day. (Hey, reading aloud to each other in bed counts). Yes we realize everyone has different lifestyles and responsibilities and for those working parents check out a few ideas here the ideas are great for singles too.

We commit to working to share our lifestyle with others. For the next 6 weeks we will be participating in Harvest like migrant farm workers, we'll let you know what we discover. And we hope your work is satisfying and life-affirming to you as well. Americans - "Enjoy your Labor Day Weekend!"

THE END

Narrated Walking Tours

Discover history and natural science of an area on narrated walking tours. My honey and I borrowed an MP3 player from the library pre loaded with narrative tracks. Some cities have downloadable files to transfer to a personal MP3 player.

While I love guided tours, some guides are more entertaining and knowledgeable than others. I prefer the MP3 tours for being comprehensive, entertaining and the best part flexible (just try fast-forwarding a guide). My honey loves architecture and we enjoyed the tour of homes, businesses and public art. We lingered in some places and hustled through generic offerings.

The familiar often hides secret spots; a native sees pubic art and artifacts every day making the experience mundane. New construction may obscure what once was prominent. Landmarks and unfamiliar locations are best enjoyed on foot at a walking pace. The simple act of walking slows us down enough to read markers and signs, observe people and window-shop.

THE END

Swing My Way

“I’m dressed, my hair is done and I have on lipstick.” I let my honey know I was ready for our date.

My honey’s turn to come up with an idea usually results in spontaneous decisions. “I have a silly idea for something to do this afternoon.” I didn’t bother to ask ‘what?’ and my honey continued. “We could go to the park and swing.”

Ahh! An activity reminiscent of simpler pleasures. “Let’s go.”

The swings seemed to be hanging around hoping for someone to come along. The empty park indicated kids, teens and adults prefer motors and virtual games. To prove my supposition, six ATVs roared into the park from a path and the riders milled around for a few moments to stretch and have a drink.

My honey and I sat on the swings. We flirted. Then we determined who could swing the highest. I won. We synchronized our swinging. We tried everything we learned as kids, including the twist. My honey spun me around and wound the chains tight then let me go. I spun fast and then faster while the swing tried to return to the proper position. And when I was a touch lightheaded, we shared a tender almost first-crush kiss. No wonder young people think they know so much about dating; as we grow older we forget simple pleasures.

THE END

Hey, where’s my Rubber Ducky?

Be on the lookout for small-town festivals. Instead of being just a mile short of Mayberry as might be expected, these festivals are worth the time if for nothing more than community camaraderie. I picked up a flyer at the library for a festival a few towns away and my honey thought the idea sounded enjoyable. Of course we recycled the flyer and worked errands into the jaunt to maximize fuel.

The live band in the park was wonderful, maybe not arena ready still really great. The jokes among friends and the off-the-cuff performance by calling people up on stage for special performances of monologues, humor and folksy songs made the experience special in a way not possible with extensive planning. We felt like we were invited into someone’s living room for a jam session.

With slices of pie and waffles with toppings people ate their fill. Main Street closed down for the two days and the residents took advantage of the no-car zone to play games, have impromptu concerts and used the opportunity to get their party on.

Eco-friendly is nothing without the feeling of communing and the nice thing everyone’s welcome. For one afternoon, night or weekend you could adopt a small town and make it yours. You never know, you might be like us and find a place where they race bathtub toys down the river and catch them in a net to determine the winner.

THE END

Curtain Call

Innovative craftspeople use scraps of fabric for quilts and other projects. My honey suggested window dressing for the naked kitchen windows. My quilting aunt decided to take a summer off from projects. When a friend of a friend of hers cleared out a home for a nursing home move and gave her the bags of fabric, my aunt thought the purple fabrics looked like me and passed them on again.

The date portion of the enterprise happened in two settings. One Sunday afternoon, my hone and I examined, read and judged our favorites designs from books checked out of the library. Creating the pattern from a picture fell to me (playing to my strength). Supervision and assistance went to my honey.

The decision making spilled over from afternoon into late evening. We debated environmental control, trapping heat and opening the curtains wide for solar heating and lighting before we decided on the design. The fabric scraps provided an additional challenge, instead of solid panels I had to piece them together in such a way that it appeared intentional.

Then we spend a morning snipping, sewing and adding blows. With only time and skill with no purchase of new fabric or supplies and keeping waste to a very minimum, we hung designer pieces of window art. Good news. Even though I have design experience, anyone can make curtains with a pattern. Go ahead and look at the books at the library, there are even pattern books in the sewing section.

THE END

Cattails, Hazelnuts and Berries, Oh My

My honey invited me to spend an afternoon where the wild things grow. Wild crafting is part of our hunter-gatherer heritage. However, each state’s rules should be followed and permission obtained from the landowners. We hiked near the stream until we found a berry patch and picked our share. Signs indicated either deer or bear had been there before us, still we found plenty of ripe raspberries, picked a couple cupfuls and left many for the next visitor.

The mosquitoes and black flies must hang out beside patches that lure in humans. I had enough bites to indicate they also enjoyed a feast.

The reward of foraging is the sensation that food we work for just tastes better. My honey ate as many just picked berries as those to take home. I just picked to take home. During our walk we discovered a bog with an abundance of cattails and a few hazelnut bushes with the pods just turning from brown to green. “We’ll let them ripen and come back in a week.”

THE END

Soaking up the Environment

Any activity becomes romantic when you haul your love interest along with you. The weather finally cleared and my honey accompanied me for the bog walk. Bogs are amazing biomes; wet all the time and teeming with life. Unfortunately for the bog that day the life included us.

I took one step off the path; my boot sank into whatever spongy earth lived under the moss. When I started to fall I shared the pleasure by clutching my honey’s belt loop. Arms flailing my honey still managed to maneuver me onto the bottom for cushioning.

Shhhthwap! Aah! The bog welcomed us.

I lay very still arms and legs outstretched pretending we’d landed on a waterbed. The day was perfect at 82 degrees Fahrenheit and 56% humidity. What wasn’t wet before soon soaked up murky water. When the six, eight, three-thousand-legged creature slithered across my neck, I was done dreaming and went straight to screaming. My honey smothered a few of my favorite words. “Holy Sugar and Flying Buttress.”

My elbow sank when I tried to rise and I fought for control like a sailor on a capsizing raft. My honey flailed in the opposite directions and we banged head then used them for leverage along with a rotting log for support we maneuvered like a limping crab back onto the path.

We stared at each other. Awed and turned on because of the exertion. We’d shot past wet t-shirt contests and mud wrestling. We were covered in bog guts and wrapped together sloppy kissing when we heard the “Ahem.” Shouldn’t clichéd throat clearing be banned?

The naturalist gave us the stern principal look. “We must stay on the marked trail to preserve the bog.”

I know he was more offended by the display of affection and his affectation of authority brought out my sass. “Looks like the bog proved it knows how to defend itself.

THE END

Fight Productively

Fight Productively

I’ve heard some couples say, “We never fight.” I’d be surprised if two people always agree and I wonder if one person doesn’t just give in to avoid conflict. My honey ad I fight on occasion, when emotions run high and we both feel like our lives depend on the outcome. I’m stubborn and I like to win. My honey considers a problem and becomes enamored with a single solution. It’s is a surprise we don’t fight more often.

I wanted to go on an informative bog walk and my honey wasn’t as interested and probably performed a rain dance on the front lawn because it rained all week and was raining that morning.

I don’t mind playing in the rain; my honey prefers to huddle indoors during a storm. I dressed and got read to leave. My honey hung back. “We might catch a cold.” Scientists do have evidence that getting wet and cold makes us susceptible to illness.

“I can make my grandmother’s ginger, honey and lemon tea to get better quicker.”

My honey ripped into my jugular. “If you had the good sense to stay inside, you wouldn’t need a remedy. The bog will still be there when the sun comes out.”

I’m stubborn, but I’m not stupid. I heard the perhaps accidental concession. My honey would go on the bog walk on a nice day. “You’re on, the very next nice day.” So far it’s rained for at least two weeks. HMMMM.

THE END

Getting Involved in the Community

Most of our ‘romantic dates’ are spontaneous. My honey suggested a day, when we would make a commitment to a specific time and destination. My honey pays attention to our local government and knew a zoning change was proposed for our neighborhood and thought I might like to attend.

We had a real date, a real time. The purpose though seemed more civic than romantic. The public hearing portion allowed us to state our support for the zoning change. After discussion, the council voted to pass the change.

While my honey and I relaxed and shared a yogurt, our discussion prompted my thoughts on why our date was romantic. All the elements necessary for a solid relationship played out in moments. State the issue, get input, discuss the issued and make a decision. The most important element is for one person has the floor to state his/her position.

THE END

Pawnshop Experiment

Looking to get rid of some things and make a few dollars? Pawnshops purchase items, but don’t expect a reasonable price for what an item is worth. The dealer looks the item up at an online auction site to see 1) how the item is selling and 2) the lowest price no matter what the brand. Their offer – approximately one-third to one-half of the lowest price found. Advantages to seller – quick money and to get rid of an item immediately.

My honey and I took my violin to pawn shops as an experiment. We weren’t really intending to sell the violin just use it for research. First stop – violin appraisal and was quoted a value of $300. At the music store specializing in the purchase of used instruments the owner refused the instrument due to lack of interest except at the beginning of a school year. At the pawnshops we visited I was offered $25, $15, and $10. At these same shops we checked prices for digital cameras and discovered selling prices approximately 10% below retail.

Final thought – as a way to receive a few dollars, the pawnshop would work. Donations to non-profits are a potential source of tax credits if a person itemizes taxes. If you’d just like to keep the item from becoming trash, give it to someone who will appreciate it by using Freecycle.com in your area.

THE END

Cruisin’ through Town

Since Henry Ford produced the opportunity for everyone to travel with the Model T Americans have associated freedom with driving. My honey comes fro a small town where the vehicle is a status symbol. In the early evening a common habit was cruising’ through town to be seen and to see who was out. They would stop in the parking lot at one end of town and gals might hop from car to car to gossip. The guys would say hello and talk about being the best defined by speed, horsepower and class.

Every graduating class of seniors gathered at that same parking lot on the last day of school and cruise to the high school at the other end of town. The community supports the rite of passage, a police escort leads the way, horns honk, flags fly. People line up along the way to cheer for them; a small-town send off into the world. Even my honey’s hometown has changed. We’ve cruised through town a couple of times, but only to run errands. Cruisin’ exists in memory. The price of gasoline makes people conserve. The latest fad is fitness and now we meet people on the exercise paths and trails. We still talk about speed and power, but it relates to marathon training and muscles.

THE END

Violin Lesson from My Playmate

My honey’s a musician, a gift inherited from a self-taught organ-violin-guitar-accordion playing father. My music teacher in college accused me of being tone-deaf and requested I not sing. My honey says, “thankfully I don’t have to hear your voice very often.” On occasion the mood strikes and I try to sing, mostly very old advertising jingles. My honey’s beautiful voice drowns my ‘cat clawing a lady’s eyes out squeak.

I have longed to play the violin and my honey finally agreed to listen, coach and teach me to play. For Sunday afternoon pleasure I received a request. “Play me a song.”

Fair enough. I’d learned all the notes, learned proper finger (I love music lexicon!) and relied on the already mastered skill of reading sheet music. With thirty minutes practice I managed a passable ‘Frere Jacques’. I have a future of many hours of practice before we will harmonize, as long as I don’t sing we are in accord.

THE END

No Longer Reason to Dread Vacation Slides

Many of us think of a plausible escape when it comes to friends’ vacation videos, but we’ve found a way to make the event romantic. My honey embraced the digital age and likes to convert some pictures from youth and early adulthood. Our solution is a round robin of five-minute PowerPoint presentations. We choose a theme (sometimes romance, sometimes adventure, etc) then create presentations to compete for creativity, best story and other awards.

Instead of popcorn, we set out hors d’oeuvres. My honey sits in a recliner and I sit on the floor. Romance among friends usually remains sweet, shoulder massage, a quick tickle of the soft spot behind my ear and a nuzzle of lips against my hair. Out of respect for each presenter we ask questions after each presentation. Our friends have become eager to share their good times. We’ve all gained some inside information about destinations, like being there except we don’t get our hair wet or windblown. We can each enjoy vacations and then bring our friends on the virtual tour to be easier on the environment.

THE END

The End of My Rope

“We can be on a date in two separate locations.”

Hmm. I wasn’t sure I agreed with my honey when he made this suggestion. I thought a date meant being together, doing something together. TOGETHER. What possible ecologically friendly activity could he have in mind that we could do together except in two separate locations? I imagined phone romance, telepathic connection, two cans on a string for whispering come-hithers.

“You’re the one with experience as a roofer.” He meant a rooftop destination without wine and hors d’oeuvres. At least we’d have a view of the city.

He wanted me to out on the dormer three stories above ground and patch a hole created by a tree branch. I was definitely up for the job. Because of the height thing, he worried about my safety and insisted on the harness. He sat by the chimney to keep an eye on me. That’s testing trust, willing to believe he and the harness would catch me.

THE END

Rock the Walls

Musicians collect admirers. Perhaps they have a unique attractive force. Perhaps something is just enough different about them to give off a special signal. My honey is a musician; however, I didn’t know that when we met. And his job kept him from spending a lot of time with his music since we’ve been together. His collection of instruments sat in a corner of the bedroom.

During our travels across country he picked up his guitar. Now I understand why musicians evoke awe – the song writing. A musician will put feelings, emotions, truth into a son they he doesn’t even hint about in conversation. While I worked on a project, I ignored my honey until he plugged in the amp and serenaded me. My perception of romance changed. Better than a concert crushed by people, I knew his words were just for me.

This magic can be accessed by anyone by writing love letters, poetry and songs. Take time to share romantic thoughts with someone you care about and enjoy the reward.

Card from Anonymous Lover

Finding the right words may require someone else to write them. Greeting cards have become the easy way to meet that need; like being a patron of a love poet. Of course the intent is for the giver to sign the card. What would happen if people didn’t? Would we just not realize who gave us the card?

My honey found a blank card in a bedside stand, no envelope. He read the card and handed it to me. “Someone’s sentimental, but the words go for me too.”

I read the card. Romantic thoughts of joy over shared time and the desire to know him/her better. We dreamed up possible circumstances of the ‘other’ couple who shared the card and tucked it back in for the next finder. We felt honored for the glimpse into other romances.

Recycled cards provide just as much romance. One couple mentioned to us they save every card they receive and when the mood or occasion calls for a card, they rummage through to pick the right one to put out for the other person.
THE END

All We Need

The past three weeks, my honey and I traveled a distance of 2400 miles, visited 12 states and met many amazing individuals. What we learned along the way is – people need one thing, LOVE. With that one emotion in its many forms from romantic to friendship and to worship, we as humans find ways to muddle through survival and thriving.

Communication is essential to understanding each other. Often simple misunderstandings cause arguments to escalate and damage our private feelings of well-being. Both men and women are guilty of believing myths related to relationships. 10 Things Women Wish Men Knew and 10 Things Men Wish Women Knew provide a little insight into the secrets and desires of both genders. Once a romantic connection is made, nurturing the relationships means being open to various viewpoints and trying new things.

The End

Beep. We’ve Found Metal

We caught the treasure hunting bug from a friend who had collected civil War shell casings and other miscellaneous finds. The metal detector was a gift four years ago and my honey has never used it. We decided to test our luck maybe finding odd change at the community park.

We set out once we figured out the settings and set it for neutral, the ground. I carried the trowel for digging and my honey wielded the detector.

“Shouldn’t this be longer? I’m all hunched over.”

We spend three minutes finding and adjusting the telescoping rod.

Beep. Beep. I was excited. Treasure waited. The towel sank into the soft earth. I scooped up a bottle cap. Granted the cap was old, corroded and filled with dirt, but not the kind of treasure I expected.

In six-inch swaths we worked. My honey ran the detector over the bleachers just to test the sensitivity. Thirty minutes and we found three bottle caps, two pop tops and a random length of wire. We turned off the detector and walked back. My honey found $0.11 in the parking lot without even trying. Like other treasure hunters we aren’t giving up.

THE END

Half-Naked Hiking

Ever feel the need to use romance as a form of protest?

We were protesting conformity when we went hiking on a Wednesday afternoon in bathing suits. Those serious hikers we met wearing their boots, khakis, bush hats and frame packs for a day hike looked askance at us. The two women in the group sneered at my bikini. “The sun is hot, you’ll get burned.”

I’m just snippety enough to suggest jealousy. On occasion I enjoy exposing extensive portions of my skin for the sake of good ol’ fashioned reckless sun worship. When I’m in just such a mood, I tend to not follow along with the unspoken rules created by enthusiasts of a sport.

I’m certainly not pretending I eschew the use of proper precautions like sunscreen, instead I believe sometimes the view even in majestic nature is infinitely better when not fully clothed. I dare to suggest with the right partner, the right time and the right choice of trail, hiking in a bathing suit (yup better with a skimpy bikini) is romantic. Our choice of trail was described in the brochure as ‘steep, strenuous, exposed with little shade’.

Park rangers and other safety professionals offer support and advice to make sure hikers stay safe whatever the choice of hike. We are responsible and carry enough water, wear sunscreen, take along a change of clothing and some food. My honey and I live by an additional caveat; life and love are serious, sometimes we make an effort to be silly and spontaneous. Even so, we know our bodies’ limits while enjoying pleasure of skin and flesh.

THE END

Kissing Bridges

The bridge curved above the rapids of the rafting park. Water gurgled against rocks and over the dam. Rain splattered against my midnight blue umbrella and sparkled in the aura around glowing lamps. Night curtained LoDo with a black velvet backdrop for the frenetic colors and sounds created by the energy from the trendy bars in the art’s district.

Parking fills early and the simplest way to navigate in the area is by public transport or a stroll. We had made our way along the sidewalks and paths to the bridge through the park (before the 11pm curfew) headed home. A group of teens practiced acrobatic jumps and scurrying on the rocks.

I’d only once before felt a similar romantic moment. We stood still. I felt transported to Paris in a warm drizzle and pulled the umbrella a little closer for privacy. Nature beckoned. My honey was with me. I offered an invitation. My honey kissed me long, tender, matched the mood.

Always be ready to take the time when a random moment just becomes a romantic moment.

THE END

Classifying an Enviro-Friendly Date

My honey and I have been asked one question on a semi-frequent basis. “How do you decide what is an eco-friendly date?” Our answer is simple; we have four parameters we judge.

What would make IT romantic? – Sometimes just chatting about the experience is enough of a connection, but we like to share the experience, maybe hold hands, get a chance to say ‘I love you’, sneak a smooch and just know we can reach out and touch if we like.

In the many shades of green, is IT sustainable or can IT be made more environmentally friendly? While I prefer non-motorized, high action sports and events, my honey enjoys horsepower of the non-four-legged kind. We compromise because awareness and innovation are great companions in all aspects of life. To eschew all pleasures for a cause leads to frigid (yes we mean cold) fundamentalism. Happy people spawn invention and creative thought. We would encourage anyone to enjoy any sport as long as you consider the impact and think of possible ways to make it better for the future.

Will IT be something to hold our interest over time? Will we do IT more than once? This might qualify as a two-for in our parameters. We have tried activities that aren’t for us with rented equipment, just to see if we might like the activity. We consider this the best way to start something new instead of buying all the latest gear and then deciding we’d made a poor investment. Most often we try out a sport or activity and then we try to scrounge the equipment. If that fails, we purchase used at yard sales or second-hand stores. Since my honey is an experimenter he loves to design, repair and retrofit (the hobby feeds the romance).

Is IT able to be enjoyed by individuals with different skill levels and abilities? Activities we enjoy in our twenties should be adaptable for our sunshine years. We believe grit leads to gratification and we want a lifetime of romance and activities in agreement with our ideals.

No matter what an individual’s commitment to being environmentally conscious, activities can be adapted for romance and to be environmentally friendly. If you are passionate about an activity, find a way to share it with someone you care about and impress that person with your concern for the future too. Happy dating.

The End

Ideas for Hybrid Love and Environmentally Conscious Dates

This list of ideas ranges from personal heart thumping to the ooh-aah feeling invoked by social responsibility. Not only should these ideas pump the heart but satisfy the green conscience. For those who prefer a real thrill of adrenaline rush maybe the additive effect of doing multiple of these activities at the same time will suffice or convince your date to accompany you on a challenge.

Kissing and snuggling – no matter where done, the thrill entices and the environment unharmed

Massage – find a favorite massage oil (almond is my personal favorite) and let the fingers soothe

Reading aloud to each other – the choice of reading material leads to romance unknown (for a decadent daily treat try reading in bed for a few minutes each night)

Kissing Tag and Scavenger Hunts – games recalled from youth can be updated with romantic and environmental themes

Cooking Together or Picnicking – who can resist the urge to feed the need for romance

Hiking and walking – for all skill levels from a nature path in the city or to the summit of a Fourteener in the Rockies

Tastings (Cheese, Wine, Olive Oil) – feed the mind, feed the palate, share your thoughts

Cleaning or Shared Chores – so maybe duties and responsibilities aren’t inherently romantic, but having someone to share them with and make it a game or race does make the chores easier.

Canoeing – in solitary, with paddles and silence enough to hear the ripple of the water when a fish splashes

Photography – whether you want to be the model or try your hand at nature photography, bone up on the basics by reading a photography magazine. Some people earn extra income from photos.

Tours - Maybe visiting an organic farm or touring a factory. Might even include adventure or green vacation packages or guided sports, the activity level is easy to personalize.

Shared Learning – geared to personal interests whether you’d like to learn more about renewable energy or take a yoga class. Learning together means sharing thoughts aloud and having something to talk about later.

Volunteering – have you always wanted to participate in trail maintenance or clean up (my favorite site is Volunteer.gov – many of these opportunities are longer duration)

THE END

Tubin’ the Creek

Romance must float in particles on the air during the spring. Couples hold hands, kiss in the park and wrap arms around each other for a stroll. The balmy 78° F degrees on a lazy Friday afternoon in May beckoned the adventurous romantics to the creek. Even with the icy water we followed other up the path to the landing to splash our tubes in the river. Thanks to spring runoff the water level rose several inches and swifter water created whitewater for a challenge

We shared the creek with kayakers enjoying the rapids while we made our lazy float downstream. Saying the water was ‘refreshing’ understated how much I needed to warm up in the sun afterward. Hot tea on a warm day didn’t go amiss either. My honey and I dried off in the sun and perched our collapsible loveseat on the bank. From this vantage point we could watch others revel in the urge to splash triggered by spring.

Tubing the creek in itself is eco-friendly, but is the tube? Most are made from either PVC (vinyl) or Neoprene both from petroleum products. I found mine at a used-goods store perhaps keeping it from a landfill. In my teens, I had first dibs on the inner tubes from tractor tires to patch up and use for water sports. We figured this was eco-friendly because we were reusing. Each person must make the decision.

THE END

Crash without a Video Camera

Alternative commuting in one of my favorite exercises; I can run my errands and stay fit. My honey encourages using the bicycle but only tolerates my decision to inline-skate six miles. I understand the concern I might get hurt. We headed to the library on the exercise path. My honey rode the bike and I skated along. We matched for speed and made it a scenic jaunt. We saw rabbits, Canadian geese, stopped at the waterfall, shared a bottle of water in a grove.

The path wound along the creek and into the mountains. I brought running shoes for the possibility the path might become too steep. We were fine until the trip home. I over-rated my skate’s ability to handle speed. The way to minimize getting hurt is to fall correctly.

I fell, rolled and quickly sat up to assess damage. I’m sure the event would have looked amusing on a video. My honey turned back and rode to me to make sure I didn’t need emergency assistance. I wear protective gear and sustained only road rash on my leg, arm and side. Without the wrist guard I might have broken the wrist. And wouldn’t you know when we got to the rest stop, the park rangers asked if we’d be willing to fill out a survey about our experiences in the park that day.

THE END

A Visit to the National Renewable Energy Lab (NREL)

The visitors’ center at NREL South Table Mountain Facility in Golden, CO is an excellent starting point for an introduction to renewable energy. Research at this facility has won numerous scientific awards. The interactive exhibits and models provide easily understandable application of principles.

Our visit was educational, but romance is what individuals add to an experience. My honey and I made our experience a real date by talking about each exhibit and discussing what take-back-to-our-lives messages we learned. Whenever an exhibit was hands-on, we took turns and then pitted our brains against each other’s for the quiz at the end. We admit the questions could be answered by attentive elementary school students. We each got one wrong, because we over-thought our answers. We returned to the exhibits to make sure we understood.

Romance is more than snuggles and love; it’s shared experience and learning new things together too. For a similar experience in any area, check local listings for companies specializing in renewable energy (solar, wind, geothermal, hydrogen, biomass, ocean and hydropower). Ask if the company offers tours or workshops. Remember options through the electrical energy supplier as well.

THE END

Pilgrimage to Red Rocks

Mention Red Rocks to most musicians and they’ll conjure a dream of playing at the outdoor amphitheater in Morrison, CO. The acoustics make the venue a natural for music and in the early part of the last century the then owner brought opera singers to the natural setting to perform.

During the 1920s as part of the Civilian Conservation Corps projects, the infrastructure was built by young men who were required to sent home most of their wages to support their families. Before that the area was sacred to the Native Americans and to go into pre-written history at Dinosaur Ridge and view where dinosaurs left tracks and fossils as evidence of having lived in the area.

I felt a chill of entering a sacred place when we drove up the hill and through the arch carved into the rock. We went to the visitors’ center first and enjoyed the video on the history and concerts at Red Rocks. Then we explored the amphitheater. My honey stood on the stage and sang a love song for me while other visitors exercise running the steps or the benches.

In deference to the part of us that requires frequent exercise, we hiked the 1.4mile Trading Post Trail (sometimes it felt like a longer distance). The hike was easy with minimal challenging sections; stone steps made the steep climbs easier and we were careful of loose gravel on stone surfaces. Along the trail we saw evidence of restoration efforts where the trail has been changed to protect the soil and native plants. At one point we shared the trail with two rabbits.

Remember no matter how short the hike, be a responsible hiker and dress appropriately, carry drinking water and stay on marked trails or in areas intended for recreation.

THE END

Sustainability is Sexy

Upscale and luxury “green” products and services are available along with the ability to purchase carbon offset credits. This makes reduce-reuse-recycle-repurpose seem retro at best and lowly to the point of being mediocre. My honey and I try to consume less and be efficient with use of resources. To this end we make knowledge, awareness and action sexy. Going to a Green Festival or even may be a reasonable enviro-friendly activity for a date, so is picnicking in the backyard on what’s fresh in our garden.

There was a time in the early part of the 20th century when the automobile meant freedom. Having access to a vehicle mean wider travels, driving somewhere scenic for a picnic became a routine Sunday afternoon event for many and car camping was considered a vacation. Times change and “green’ has become a marketing buzzword for increased consumerism. Add a hybrid or alterative fuel SUV/RV, some organic food and a few carbon offsets we can call driving 100 miles to a resort for recreation and partying an environmentally friendly activity. Sure, the idea feels sexy, but what about giving back and leaving smaller carbon footprints?

Sexy can be a solid relationship based on respect and shared values. And such a relationship requires effort. A couple can have it all. Lavish living might seem sexy and make headlines; true sexiness comes through soul-deep intimacy with each other and the environment and that can remain out of the headlines.

THE END

Choice Forces Conservation

While traveling in our RV instead of always stopping at places to hook up to water, electric and sewer, we dry camp. We save money and think of environmental concerns. Our unit is self-contained and made for this specific purpose. Our RV has all the comforts of upholstered sofas, full kitchen and bathroom and a king size bed along with the basics of heat, lights and indoor plumbing.

Along with comfort though, the storage tanks for propane, fresh water, gray water (used bath and sink water) and black water (sewer) have limited capacity. We take extra care to monitor or use and stay in campgrounds once every week to empty, refill and do laundry.

The benefit we enjoy is the variety of backyards in the mountains, near lakes and rivers, in forests and in RV parks within city limits for the urban vibe enjoyed mostly by loft/high-end apartment dwellers.

A better awareness of how our choices affect the environment helps us be more careful. Critical effort breaks the use-withou-consequences mentality.

THE END

Recycling in the Round

“Let’s do all the errands in one trip.” My honey is a stickler for conservation of effort. If the vehicle leaves the driveway it better be because we have too much stuff to carry or the distance is too far to be feasible by walking or biking (about 12 miles – a decent workout).

Every stop is planned for maximum efficiency. We are good if one parking stop hits the can recycler, the bank, the grocery story and the library. Since we read for fun and research, we have many heavy tomes traveling back and forth.

At the second stop, I crammed the used printer cartridges into my purse and grabbed the six-year-old cell phones I’d discovered under the bed. I walked across the partaking lot the size of a corn field; really this development was a former cornfield. I made my deliveries and wandered to the farm supply store to meet my honey.

We packed everything in our canvas bags and headed home. Two stops, eight errands. I talked myself out of an impulse purchase of a frozen latté. As a reward my hone made me a double chocolate with vanilla soy milk when we got home.

THE END

Celebrating Cozy Moments

Sometimes romance doesn’t require planning or effort. Heavy rain cancelled outdoor plans. We rejoiced because the Rocky Mountains needed the precipitation to stave off drought for the southwest, which relies on the Colorado River for water.

I’d planned ahead by stocking the refrigerator and pantry in case a blizzard snowed us in and prevented deliveries. We grilled eggplant, zucchini and red peppers on the patio. Rain pounded a musical beat on the metal roof. A chill breeze came up and we bundled into hats, mittens and thermal jackets. Listening to nature was enough while we snuggled on the loveseat.

The End

Responsible Pet Stewardship

Outdoor exercise is a major part of my day; therefore I meet a lot of animals both domestic and wild. Hardly ever does one of them follow me home three miles. I tried to send the dog home and he persisted running beside me as if he belonged. My honey thought we should call animal control since the dog didn’t have a collar.

I hesitated; the policy in our county isn’t to keep animals for more than 48 hours. “Maybe we can find the owner.”

“With this size population he could be from anywhere.”

I agreed with him in principle and still called dispatch. The first question – “Is the dog loose or contained.”

I figured I had implied I had the situation under control. “He’s inside my fenced yard.”

“I’ll send an officer.”

Since this wasn’t an emergency I didn’t expect prompt response. We gave the dog a bowl and water and sat with him to help him relax.

In ten minutes one officer arrived and sat across the street waiting for backup. Then they both approached. “Don’t you want to keep the dog?”

“Of course I do, he’s a sweetheart, but I can’t.”

“If we take the dog, it’ll be put to sleep in 48 hours, maybe before the owner gets a chance to look for it.”

“So what are our options?”

“You can keep the dog long enough to try to find the owners and then you can take the dog to a Dumb Friends League shelter where it’ll have a chance to find a home.”

No question about my choice. The police thanked us and left. “We know where to come if the owner reports it missing.”

Great, anther date night interrupted by life, my philosophy remains to enjoy our time together regardless. After our grilled veggie sandwich meal, we went to the area where I’d first seen the dog trying to catch up to me and started asking people who were out in their yards if they recognized him.

Finally success, the neighbor pointed to a house. “He belongs two doors over.”

“His owner asked, “Where is the collar?”

“He didn’t have one on.”
“For how long?”

Hmm. Apparently they didn’t miss him. Then she looked at the fence and saw the collar dangling from a post. “Oh, it’s right over there.

End of story, dog home safe. My honey and I spent the evening talking. Society is part of animal stewardship. Please be aware of options including RFID (radio frequency identification inserted under the skin). Know the laws in your city and county. Donate to rescue and no-kill organizations.

The End

Hunting the Edible Easter Eggs

Ritual makes celebrations personal. Every year I paint Easter eggs (and for other holidays too) with a companion. I had an eco-idea this year – food grade pain on hardboiled eggs my hone could later use of stuffed eggs and potato salad. Bonus we had a three-for activity; decorate the eggs together, hide the eggs for each other to seek, eat the evidence and compost the shells.

For paint I mixed 2 tablespoons flour and 2 tablespoons water into a paste and for color on a palette mixed food coloring or dyes made from fruits and herbs a spoon at a time. We used brushes and a regular dinner plate and the clean up was easy.

Warning: this product doesn’t paint like a regular pain; it splotches some and doesn’t spread well. All my eggs were patterned on fabric, the styles of tie-dye, paisley and polka dots. My honey painted reminiscent of grass, mosaic broken glass and a football.

The eggs dried quickly because we painted them while they were still hot. We could immediately use them to hide and I grew frustrated if my hone hid them too well. We refrigerated the eggs promptly after play using proper food safety.

Conquering the Mountain of Recycled Asphalt Product (R.A.P)

What happens when date night must be sacrificed for a home improvement project? I arrived home to find a mountain of R.A.P. (sometimes known as conbit) blocking the driveway. We’d chosen the recycled product for cost effectiveness, durability and as a viable environmentally-friendly surfacing.

Instead of going out, we attacked the project with shovels, rake and wheelbarrow. The original plan was work together, fill the wheelbarrow, dump the material in the fresh spot and rake it flat. It worked for three loads and then I banged my honey’s shovel with mine. The vibration rattled me like a cartoon character.

We settled on playing to our strengths. I filled the wheelbarrow. My honey wheeled it to the new site and dumped it. My hone raked the pile into a flat surface. I retrieved the wheelbarrow and filled it again. We worked much faster this way and still enjoyed moments for a quick kiss or hug. And the intentional five minute breaks to enjoy sips of a cold beverage. Physical labor is thirsty work and sweetened ice tea with mint really refreshed though there is flexibility to choose a favorite beverage.

We planned to work until the project was done. Thank goodness for streetlights, because we worked until almost midnight. I figured romance was definitely out while I limped into the house. Not so. After a quick shower my honey massaged my sore muscles with lavender and mint oil and of course I willingly reciprocated.

Next time you have a home improvement project, prepare a picnic, plenty of cold drinks and a plan to work together. A real connection happens when two people get dirty, sweaty and can still manage a hug and a smile.

THE END

Scavenger Hunt

My honey and I picked up a brochure listing the outdoor sculptures in Golden, CO. The brochure made it really easy by showing the locations on a map. They were located around the downtown area and in easy walking distance. As we visited each one we marked ti off on the map and at each one told each other something we appreciated about the other person connected to the sculpture.

The hardest one to relate something romantic to was the swimming fish. I tried too hard to think of something romantic and this is all I came up with. “From among so many thank you for choosing me.”

My honey has a sense of humor. “I’m glad you’re a great cook.”

Every day provides opportunities to express love, some of these days remind us that love can be taken for granted if we don’t put in effort. While we enjoyed this as a romantic activity, scavenger hunts are great for families and groups too. I saw one team playing with a list and using a camera phone to prove they’d been to each spot.

In your area, check with the chamber or commerce for landmark maps and information. Or pick up brochures listing a sampling of things to do and places to go. These are great for a location scavenger hunt or do a little research on the internet and create your own list of things you’d like to see/experience.

THE END

Last Conga in a Snow Labyrinth

I love blizzards because they turn my thoughts to romance, most often of the go out and play variety. To walk the labyrinth is considered a form of meditation. The temporary nature of snow adds an extra element of mystery to the labyrinth, a connection to nature and the fundamental ecological concept of leaving nothing but footprints.

We set down the pattern and worked with two shovels to scoop away the snow and reveal green grass pathways inside a heart shape. Yeah! Yeah! A little romantic clinch never made a person more than gag.

We played a game of Foxes and Bunnies remembered from childhood. The fox can only take inner paths and the bunny can only take the perimeter. The fox tries to catch the bunny where the two paths cross. The object of the game is for the bunny to not get caught. I preferred the opposite objective and when I was caught, we waltzed for a moment, and then I took off on a bunny hop and was grabbed at the waist to turn it into a conga instead. My right foot stuck in a 13-inch snow drift at one of the turns and down we went.
“Your cheeks are all pink and so are your lips. Kissable.” And there it was the spark of spontaneous romance.

I never knew a labyrinth could inspire so many future memories. The day after the blizzard the sun came out to melt away the evidence.

THE END

Nothing Trivial about Getting to Know Each Other

My honey and I thought we knew each other pretty well until we made up a trivia game for our last date. Our thirteen questions ended up with the potential for various answers and raised ideas to discuss. We learned things we’d never known about the other person.

You might be surprised, as we were about how we answered some questions. Our gut instinct and our final answers didn’t always coincide. The harder we thought, the more complicated we made the answers.

“What are the rules?” My honey knows I like to change rules as I go along.

“In this case we have no set rules.”

“How do we win?” My honey is almost as competitive as I am.

“We both win, nobody finishes first and nobody walks away unsatisfied.” I thought he was being too serious and needed to inject some humor. He laughed and accepted a piece of scrap paper to write down his answers. Then we each took turns guessing how the other person answered the questions.

For inspiration, you are welcome to try our questions or adapt the questions for topics you’d like to share. After all this is a personal game. If you prefer, dig out the boxing gloves to punish wrong answers or if you prefer reward correct answers with a kiss.

Two favorite outdoor activities?
Would you rather do a job you love, a job that pays the most or a job that makes a difference?
Accomplishment most proud of?
Book and/or movie means the most to you?
Chore you absolutely hate?
What kind of enviro-friendly vehicle would you like to own?
What is the first eco-activity you remember doing?
Three favorite foods?
Favorite enviro-crusader or role model?
What would you do on an ideal vacation?
What home improvement project takes priority?
Other than intimacy, what is your favorite activity with your significant other?
What is your favorite kind of bread?

THE END

Made Over in the Click of a Magic Mouse

Wanting to look attractive to a significant other is part of the relationship package. I’ve often stood in front of a mirror; changed clothes four times, put my hair up and then combed it back down. What if I could experiment with a new look and get my honey’s opinion without a potentially devastating haircut or purchasing accessories?
We had the opportunity to find out using a tool on mylifetime.com. We cuddled up together, shared the computer and made changes to my uploaded photo. In three clicks my hair became spiky and green. Well why not add a tiara, eyeglasses and a tattoo? We played around with all of the changes I’d dare only in the virtual world.

“I crown thee princess of the Green Coolies.”

Even though we sat side by side, my honey sent me a text message picture of a dozen virtual roses via cell phone. I chose an MP3 song to dedicate to us.

After the initial fun we managed to be serious and picked out a potential new hairstyle and compared the before and after images.

When the fun ended, I needed to escape the virtual and experience something real, a real kiss and a real cuddle. Later I'll make the real visit to the salon for my new ‘do’. Then I plan to try on all the dresses in my closet, choose my highest heels and then when I’m satisfied, I'll twirl in front of my honey.

“How do I look?” Part of the fun is asking the question with only one answer.

“Sweetheart, you look great in anything.”

THE END

Personal Pinups

A date doesn't require a destination and any activity is appropriate as long as we are being attentive to each other. 

I'm a fan of the 1940s-style pinups. These pictures depicted healthy women with pink cheeks and glowing eyes who were comfortable with fun and sensuality. They became an inspiration or motivation for military men to make it through the war and return home.

The idea of posing for such a photo excited me and inspired my honey and I to choose clothing from what I already own. My honey found a camisole I've kept for years. A big plus to an environmentally friendly lifestyle with healthy eating and regular exercise means I can still wear clothes I wore twenty years ago.

My honey chose a location and adjusted the settings on our digital camera. Posing in front of the camera made me feel like a model. I moved with each click of the camera frame after frame.  I love the digital camera over film because we can delete the pictures we don't like without having to print even an index print first. 

My honey isn't as picky as a photo editor and loved all the pictures. "You look beautiful." Of course he's prejudiced.

I chose my favorite in wallet size. My pinup will not grace the side of a bomber or hang on the walls of many garages, but it reflects the essence of a pinup with extras. We share dreams, ideals and a vision for the future.

I'm his girl and a sassy picture to look at when he's not with me is additional incentive to hurry home.

THE END

Skate Park Moments

Thanks to the popularity of sports on wheels, cities have added skate parks to the public domain. These parks aren't just for skateboarders and the youth. Depending on the time of day the park might be the refuge of just one skater. As a skater I’ve evolved from skating on ice on frozen ponds during the winter to indoor roller rinks and then to the outdoors on roads and trails. Sometimes I even have the skate park to myself.

Skates come in a variety of shapes and styles specialized for the intended use. When I first started ballroom style dancing on skates I took lessons at the rink. My skates were the standard roller-skates also called quads and remain my preference for dancing. When I go to the skate park I put on my inline skates with the softer wheels to make the road ride less bumpy. I love switching from speed skating to get to the park to the jumps, spins and invariably a few falls.

My honey first skated on hockey skates and prefers speed. Our two styles can be compatible, but certainly doesn’t make us suitable dancing partners on wheels. We enjoy the park separately. He skates the perimeter and revels in the speed of the concrete surface. Sometimes he just sits and watches me. Other times we skip the park and race.

On our last skate date he told me something he’d never mentioned before. I was practicing a new move and he beckoned me to him.

“One time before we met I was picking someone up at the rink and I saw you skating with a partner. I thought ‘wow, she’s really good.”

I don’t recall being that great. I suppose like beauty that judgment is relative to the observer. I keep practicing and every week I improve. The skating isn’t what brought us together, but it is something we can share.

THE END

Since Beverage Containers Don't Self-Destruct

The aluminum can was created for beverages at the Coors brewery in Golden, CO in 1959. The reason for the change was careless discarding of steel and tin beverage cans causing environmental problems. The company also instituted recycling of the aluminum can.

We live in an enjoy and ditch society where taking a moment to even think about the destiny of a can is inconvenient. My honey and I perhaps think too much and simple observation resulted in this question begging for action leading to an answer. “How many beverage cans could we pick up on the three-mile loop I usually use for my daily run?”

We took our bikes and two bags determined to crush the cans to take up less space. We underestimated the number of can we would find. The two bags were full before we made it halfway and we’d only done one side of the road. We made a trip home to dump the bags and go back out again.

Some people in cars glared at us when they passed us. Picking up cans or trash along the roads seems to be equivalent of dumpster diving. Trust me; we weren’t in this for the money. Our recycler pays twenty cents per pound for aluminum. It was higher but the economy hit recyclers too. We ended up with 233 cans and earned $1.40 for the scrap aluminum. We wondered if we would have found fewer cans if we lived in a state that charged a can deposit. At five cents per can we would have collected $11.65.

I’m curious though. Drinking and driving is illegal. So why did we find a majority of beer cans?

THE END

Swapping Chores

My idea of spending quality time with my honey doesn’t include chores. However, making chores fun is a better idea that procrastinating or complaining. We made the challenge entertaining. I’m not one to avoid things I don’t understand or haven’t experienced. According to social conditioning household chore have long been feminine domain and the outdoor chores fall into the masculine realm.

What would happen if we switched roles? I was concerned a few appliances might be harmed during the completion of this challenge, so we decided to work together. Turns out my honey adapted better than I did. Household duties don’t necessarily require high level skills just the ability to become inured to tedium

Changing the oil in the vehicle would be easy with practice and if I knew what I was doing. My honey offered to talk me through the procedure and became the inadvertent director of a comedy production. I thought it was grunt work to carry the mat to absorb spills and placed it under the vehicle along with the drip pan to catch the used oil. He handed me a rag to facilitate cleanup and I slid under the vehicle on my back just like a professional.

“Turn the plug slowly and then remove it quick and get out of the way.”

I didn’t follow that direction quite right. Oil spurted and ran down my arm. I dropped the plug and it fell into the drip pan. I had to fish it out and wipe it off to put it back once the oil drained.
My hair fell into my eyes and I swiped it away and gave myself two black sun-glare blocking marks under my eyes.

With the plug back in place, I crawled out with the used oil and smeared rag. I had to stand on a stool to be able to reach to pour in the new oil. Then I checked the dipstick to make sure it was at the right level. Success. My honey walked me through checking the other fluids and tire pressure and where to put the oil to go to the recycler.

Learning new things can be fun. I’m not sure about the motor oil facial and hair treatment but my accomplishment left me refreshed and ready to learn more about “outdoor” chores.

THE END

Parlor Games

Appreciating diversion and entertainment is subjective. While some couples prefer technological age games, others enjoy the simple joy of parlor games with the unique flavor of being one-time-experience word and category games and twenty questions.

My honey and I enjoy playing parlor games because we can play them anywhere. We might start with a simple alphabet category game like naming companies starting with each letter with one point awarded by forfeit if the other person can’t think of an item for the letter and an extra point earned if the player can fill the gap.

Instead of rules engraved on paper, the rules can be negotiated for each occasion and if one person (me for instance) changes the rules in the middle nobody can wave a paper in my face accusing me of failing to follow the rules or cheating.

My second favorite thing about parlor games is not abusing natural resources except through breathing and thinking and really those should be included in just being alive. My favorite thing about playing parlor games is learning new things about my partner. Because the game can be adapted to reveal fantasies, increase knowledge and sometimes as way to showcase previously unrevealed hobbies. My honey knows history better than I do and I’m a history buff.

Romance is only what a couple is willing to make of it. Go ahead try turning off the television, computer, cell phones, music and lights. Light some candles and your imagination. Which one of you will be the first to admit you’ve run out of nicknames for body parts? Put your gray matter to work and the ol’ ticker just might speed up too.

THE END

Brewery Tour

My honey wanted to share an experience from his past with me and suggested a brewery tour. He called the guest relations number for the information and made plans for us to tour one early afternoon. I’d been on two factory tours in my life, one to a pulp and paper mill and the other to a food processing plant. I wasn’t sure what to expect.

The self-guided audio tour wasn’t working that day and the tour guide said they were giving tours old-style and told us how much she and the other guides were enjoying giving the tour again. We learned the ingredients for making beer, saw the process that takes time and patience. My favorite part was learning about their recycling procedures, water treatment and energy production and use. At the end of the tour we were able to try samples. I was impressed by the complexity of the process for a drink that has been a staple beverage worldwide for centuries.

Want to tour a factory? Choose your favorite product or one you would like to learn more about. Call the guest relations number or visit the website for tour information. Some companies may charge a nominal fee though most tours are free because the manufacturers benefit from showcasing their products. My honey enjoyed the samples and company history so much he chose to switch brands and I can vouch for the flavor of the non-alcoholic beer.

Manufacturers are pleased to present their environmentally conscious procedures and future plans to produce their products. Learning together is a good activity for couples or families especially on vacation/holiday.

THE END

Artistic Visions

While there is always the option of browsing through art museums and galleries, supporting local children can make for an interesting afternoon. Our library hosted a gallery showing of elementary students' art projects.

My honey and I wandered separately around the exhibit and paused to admire and study our favorites. On our second trip around the exhibit we held hands and pointed out what we liked about our favorites. The contrast in our favorite styles allowed us to develop and understanding of how we view the world and new insight on how we experience our relationship.

While my honey was draw to those pictures closer to realism, I enjoyed the pieces showcasing the raw talent of younger artists not yet schooled in the design principles of perspective and shading. Perhaps critics would be unappreciative of these works, but an art patron is not required to satisfy others. Enjoying a piece of art is truly subjective and we should each trust personal instincts.

If you'd like to follow in our footsteps, the experience can be replicated often for free anywhere. Contact local schools to ask if they host exhibits or student work open to the public. Other possibilities are science fairs, writing competitions, band and theater group presentation. Be prepared to pay a minimal fee for some public performances to help support the arts programs in our schools.

THE END

Casserole Worthy of Romance

Casseroles have always been a comfort food even in times of bounty. They might have a reputation for being a plain food and not worthy of cuisine status, but most cultures boast at least one very popular casserole dish. The French enjoy cassoulet a rich stew with beans, vegetables and sausage. The Greeks, Mexicans and Italians have similar layered meat and tomato dishes; moussaka is made with eggplant, enchiladas use tortillas and lasagna has several layers of filling and noodles. Asian stir-fries or stews are served over rice to make a modified version of the casserole.

Sunday afternoons of my childhood were reserved for visiting. Often a variety of aunts, uncles and cousins gathered at my grandmother’s home for dinner. After grace, we waited patiently to pass our plates to Grammy and she would use a huge metal spoon to cut into a hot casserole and give us a big serving. We sopped up every drop of the juices with a thick slice of homemade bread. We always had plenty of filling food and through the years developed a craving for her casseroles.

I have modified my cooking to my grandmother’s skills. Her recipes were adapted to make do and those recipes have been passed down through the family. One casserole she called Seven-course-dinner consisted of seven basic ingredients, potatoes, rice, onion, green pepper, hamburger, tomato and bacon layered and baked until the bacon on top was crisp and the vegetables tender. This satisfying casserole stretches the more expensive ingredients. Though I’ve adopted a meatless diet, I still make this casserole with substitutions. When I create my own casseroles, I maintain the tradition and include at least seven ingredients.

This morning my honey and I raided the refrigerator and pantry for leftovers and other ingredients. We layered everything in the slow-cooker and added tomato juice. Then we kneaded the bread dough and formed loaves. Today is the day we spend time together twice, once to prepare and then later to share the results.

THE END

Patchwork Day

A cold breeze and a wet snow made me want to stay indoors for comfort instead of venturing outside. My honey suggested reading a book together or watching a movie if I was also avoiding chores. Then I grew restless needing something interesting to do. Instead my honey pointed out the trim on my favorite towel had shrunk, the edges frayed and a threadbare spot in the cloth.

I don’t like admitting a favorite item is worn out, but he had a brilliant idea. Instead of just turning the towel into rags we could resurrect it as a bath rug. He cut away the damage and then measured the new size. We cut triangles from scrapped advertising for patterns.

Then I raided my scrap fabric to find favorite colors and cut them out. We each designed one side and then I sewed the pieces together and attached them to each side of the towel. Our project took up most of the snowy afternoon and we found a new purpose for my favorite towel as a warm cuddly cushion for damp feet after a warm shower. With two different patterns in two different colors we can flip the mat to suit our moods.

To follow our lead, check out sewing books at your local library.

THE END

Couples Tennis

Tennis might seem to be a sport of the elite athlete or the club member. I played tennis during my high school years and then only on occasion. The quick bursts of speed and stretching movements give a great workout. I wanted to add tennis to my workouts as a cross-training activity I could do with my honey.

A trip to the charity-run thrift store yielded two rackets at one dollar each. I dug through boxes in the shed to find the can of tennis balls left over from fifteen years ago. Tennis didn’t appear to be a bad investment so far and would be environmentally friendly with used equipment. Where to play? We found two public courts maintained by the city. Our best times to play were early on the weekends and at lunchtime during the week.

We followed all the rules of the championship game except we didn’t keep score. We figured we’d both win with a great workout. Now we understand why championship games have ball retrievers. Until we practice to the point of perfection at volleying our best exercise might be chasing the ball.

THE END

Dinner and a Documentary

Lentils, onions, carrots and peppers simmered all afternoon and then I added tomato paste for my version of Lentil Sloppies to be served on homemade wholegrain rolls. My slow cooker was a gift from my honey. I think he considered it an investment in future dinners. We eschewed the dining table and curled up in front of the television with our comfort good to watch a science program on the future of trash.

Researchers are thinking creatively and about long-term goals to solve the current problems associated with waste including hazardous substances. The ideal goal would be to rethink practices to reduce the amount of trash created and to find less ecologically toxic practices for manufacturing.

To envision a future without trash might defy ingrained notions of a throw away society. I believe if it can be dreamed, it can be done. Convincing regulators and the public may be the challenge. All require an investment in the future and the ability to think over a longer term. I find it romantic that my honey uses this type of forward thinking when it comes to giving me gifts.

THE END

Starting the New Year off Right

Resolutions are great as long as follow through is the next step. I live by this superstition; whatever is set in motion on the first will be a driving force throughout the year. I make my New Year’s Day special instead of the eve.

I gave my honey the honor of choosing our meal. He picked homemade pizza because it’s his favorite. I made a four-way, four-person thick crust pan pizza. Four people mean four different favorite toppings. While I prepped, I made extra dough for bread too. That’s starting the year off with a promise of warm bread throughout the year and nothing is more cheering to come home to than fresh bread after an adventure.

Being an avid adventurer my other task was choosing my itinerary for the upcoming year. While I worked on that, my honey who prefers to tinker and design read science magazines for new project ideas. We alternated reading interesting blurbs to each other and connected for inspiration.

Our celebration of the New Year was less about resolutions of what we’d like to accomplish and more about brainstorming possibilities. After all nothing can be accomplished without first having a spark and then following through with a plan.

Here’s to fresh starts and enjoying pizza the way you want it and sometimes tasting something new.

THE END